Friday, August 15, 2003

The Friday Five

1) How long did it take you to get home last night?
I walked home from University/Dundas. It took ninety minutes. All of Ringo's good work, shot to hell.

2) Were you prepared at home, with candles and batteries, a bbq and good wine?
Yes. In fact, we had some people over, made fajitas, played some tunes, got tipsy.

3) Will you go to work today?
No. I've declared myself non-essential.

4) What are you doing online? Shouldn't you be conserving energy, you yutz?
I wanted to check my bank balance, to see if I got paid (I did!). So I thought, while I was here....

5) Wide-spread power outages: Fun or Frightening?
Fun, fun, fun. I didn't enjoy creeping down nine flights of stairs in total darkness (the emergency lights had long since shut off), but everything since then has been a party.

Thursday, August 14, 2003

It's A Girl!

I just hired my assistant!!! She starts August 26th. I feel ironically philanthropic, having bestowed the gift of employment upon one so young. I'm serious! I feel like I've made the world a better place because I gave someone a job. Let's hope she doesn't suck.

Wednesday, August 13, 2003

When will this weather break? I can't stand it much longer. Thank the sweet lord for air conditioning - but I'm tired of hiding indoors. I martinied on a patio for an hour or so yesterday evening with two friends, and we thought for sure there was a semblance of a fresh breeze... but not this morning. My hydro metre is spinning at dizzying speeds. "Sorry family, Christmas is cancelled - have to pay my hydro bill." They don't know it yet, but they're not getting presents anyway. I'm buying goats for families in developing nations on behalf of my family, instead of buying them gifts. More on that later.

We have a virus on our home computer - a very annoying virus that Norton has washed its hands of, apparently. I read something about this bug in the paper yesterday. Anybody know what I should do about it? Will Dr. Hibbert give me PC Penicillin?

I'm actually breaking up with Dr. Hibbert. His snotty new partner is more drug-friendly, and I like her. Even though she still thinks my husband beats me.

Back to the computer, and one final thought for my loyal lurkers and regular readers. Have you ever noticed those four notes that your PC plays when shutting down Windows sound just like the song Mike Myers sings in "So I Married an Axe Murderer"?

She makes me horny,
Saturday morny,
I want to be Betty's Barney.

Now it'll be in your head all day. You're welcome.

Monday, August 11, 2003

My Toe Job with Ringo

"You have many callouses," Ringo tells me while rubbing sea salt and essential oils over my tired piggies. "That's good sign. It means you not lazy." That took the wind out of my sails, let me tell you. I was about to ask him to bring me another glass of wine, and to get some colder grapes for us.

The pedicure experience is one of my favourite things. This time, my soon-to-be-sailing-'round-the-world sister in law joined me. She had lots of callouses too. Then we joined our men and had lots of lunch and even more laughs. It didn't suck.

That was Friday. A migraine slammed into me later, which didn't really go away until Sunday morning. That's so typical, that I get really sick on the weekends. My dad always did too. It's called Anti Stress Syndrome. Oh well, at least I now have baby-smooth feet and conservatively polished toes! That's got to count for something, right? Right?