Canyoujust
"Hey Crabby canyoujust tell me whether the e-lert has been translated...."
"Hi, canyoujust help me find my APA manual..."
"Canyoujust show me how we format footnotes..."
"Sorry to trouble you... canyoujust let me know when you'll be finished with..."

This must be banished from our lexicon. It drives me batty.

Here's How It Works
It's snowing, so you wore your hat today. Smart thing to do. However, because you are wearing a hat, or a hood which obscures your field of vision, you must take extra care before stepping into traffic. I didn't enjoy watching you nearly become one with that taxicab last night.

And you, you idiot, racing up beside the streetcar. You nearly killed that girl. The whole city is frozen in mid-blizzard gridlock. You can clearly see the mile-long line of cars ahead of us, so why are you speeding? Why is your car moving at all? When the streetcar doors are open, you stop. End of lesson.

Praising Incompetence
A contracted Web development specialist has accidentally deleted an offline database that we were scheduled to test this morning. Now I have time to sip tea and surf. I may also write another poem, and find some amazing recipe to make for dinner tonight. I will also do some real work, but later.